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Off Base 2005 Predictions

Aprill 3, 2005

Give or take. There might be less. You do the math.

Anyway. Here are approximately 2005 things that will almost certainly happen in 2005. Probably:

The American League Cy Young Award goes to: Johan Santana…

The Minnesota Twins will be baseball’s first team to clinch…

Paul Molitor will turn down an offer to manage. Chris Chambliss will not get one…

Jose Lima will be traded to a contender by June 15…

Most baseball prognostications, including this one, will be proven to be way off base…

As usual, the World Series will be a better, truer, more spontaneous event than the Super Bowl, with actual crowd shots of real fans, but the commercials won’t be nearly as good…

The American League Central will finish this way: Twins, Indians, White Sox, Tigers, Royals…

George Steinbrenner will say something, uh, ill-advised, and Joe Torre will retire…

George Steinbrenner will say something, uh, ill-advised, and fire Brian Cashman…

Derek Jeter will host “Saturday Night Live.” George Steinbrenner will not…

Alex Rodriguez will play 25 games at shortstop, and the prospect of his playing it full-time, with some team, will create a national cable media frenzy…

Tino Martinez’ numbers: .265, 25, 75. He’ll make all the difference in the world for the New York Yankees, and rub off on A-Rod in ways that Derek Jeter didn’t in 2004…

2005. The year of the Cabrera. Forget “breakthrough” as a term to apply to Florida’s Miguel Cabrera. Try MVP. 15 wins for Baltimore’s Daniel Cabrera. And the best single season ever by an Angels shortstop, for Orlando Cabrera…

Several prominent major leaguers will miss action, delayed by visa problems…

Larry Lucchino will become part owner of a team looking for a new stadium deal…

Lou Piniella will be a force his third year in Tampa, and the Devil Rays will surge to a record of 74-88…

AL East: Red Sox, Yankees (Wild Card), Blue Jays, Orioles, Devil Rays...

John Hart will come dangerously close to a deal for an ace in July, not make one, and then sign an old guy in time for Christmas. Probably not Chuck Finley...

A Gold Glove Award winner will lead his position in errors…

"Five-tool player" will continue to reign as the most overused phrase in baseball. “We all have to be on the same page," “you do the math,” "anything can happen in a short series," “back in the day,” "intestinal fortitude," and my personal favorite, "it’s only May" will contend…

AL MVP: Vladimir Guerrero…

Arte Moreno will ponder a move south, where he’d rename his club the San Diego Angels of Oceanside…

Steve Finley’s numbers: .285, 40, 100, and a Gold Glove…

Southpaw Jamie Moyer will be called ”crafty” more times than all the crafty major and minor league right-handers combined…

Adrian Beltre’s numbers: .300, 30, 100…

AL West: Angels, A’s, Mariners, Rangers...

The year’s most ridiculous contract for a non free agent, injured playing pickup, who will miss a ton of time, for an even greater ton of money, lefty outfielder: Lance Berkman…

Countless players, play-by-play guys, and color men will refer to a just completed game as "tonight," even though it was a day game...

The Pittsburgh Pirates will be to 2005 what the Texas Rangers were to 2004, and finish above .500…

Rick Ankiel will retire as an outfielder to concentrate on pitching…

The All-Star Game will not end in a tie…

Bud Selig will talk about “integrity” and “the best interests of baseball” repeatedly, but do nothing to exhibit either…

Pete Rose will be in our face during Hall of Fame weekend…

NL Central: Cards, Pirates, Reds, Cubs, Astros, Brewers...

Trips to the disabled list for John Smoltz and blown saves for Dan Kolb…

The Atlanta Braves finally miss the playoffs. All fifty states celebrate, including Georgia...

NL CY: Tim Hudson... Brad Lidge a solid second…

Barry Larkin will fill in at short for the Nationals, and get hurt before Christian Guzman can return from injury...

NL MVP: Miguel Cabrera…

Ismael Valdez will change his name to Ismael Valdes…

Two ex-Dodger catchers on the NL All-Star squad…

Pedestrian numbers and an All-Star break vacation for Carlos Beltran...superior numbers and an All-Star start for Pedro Martinez…

Anna Benson will get more ink than husband Kris...and score more often…

Mike Piazza to an American League contender…

NL East: Marlins, Braves, Nationals, Mets, Phils…

Rockies’ GM Dan O'Dowd will drop out of the Executive of the Year discussion earlier than ever thought possible, when it's discovered that none of his so-called "revamping" can ever make a difference in Colorado…

San Francisco will finish in the bottom half of the league in all major offensive categories, except walks…

Barry Bonds numbers: .285, 20, 50, in 90 games played…

Ryan Klesko plays first base for the Atlanta Braves...

Kevin Towers will complain about something. Curt Schilling, the inability to get quality fish tacos on the road, the square footage of Petco’s outfield, the Border Patrol, smog from Los Angeles, something…

Arizona improves by 30 games…

Nomar Garciaparra will play third base for Los Angeles…

Alex Cora will play second base for Los Angeles…

The Dodgers will lose three starting outfielders to injuries and suspensions an average of twice per, while Shawn Green plays 154 games…

Kevin Brown will eek out a couple more wins than Darren Dreifort…

NL West: Padres, Dodgers (Wild Card), Diamondbacks, Giants, Rockies…

Remember, glove conquers all.…


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