2002 Predictions

This is just so easy. Can of corn. It's like, some of this stuff, I can just pluck right outta last year's column.

Here are some of the things that are almost certain to happen in the year 2002, probably:

The New York Yankees will play in the post season. Ruben Rivera will not…

Jim Leyritz will find yet another new way to criticize yet another superior player on yet another former team…

Several prominent major leaguers will miss action, delayed by visa problems…

More will pop out of the corkwork years older than they were the day before…

The Baltimore Orioles will focus on team, and be better for it…

The Series winning club will visit the White House, just in time for the 2003 All-Star Game…

The American League East will finish this way: Yankees, Red Sox, Orioles, Blue Jays, Devil Rays....

No designated hitters will win Gold Gloves this year, but at least one Award winner will lead his position in errors...

As usual, the World Series will be a better, truer, more spontaneous event than the Super Bowl, but the commercials won't be nearly as good…

Chuck Knoblauch will be demoted, disabled, traded or released...

AL Central: Twins, Royals, White Sox, Indians, Tigers....

John Hart will come dangerously close to a deal for an ace in July, not make one, and then sign an old guy in time for Christmas...

It'll be close, but "five-tool player" will continue to reign as the most overused cliche in sports. These gems will be right there: "good to go," "we all have to be on the same page," "anything can happen in a short series," "back in the day," "intestinal fortitude," and my personal favorite, "it's only May."

Literally hundreds of players, play-by-play guys, and color men will refer to a just completed game as "tonight," even though it was a day game...

ESPN and Fox guys will continue to mispronounce the name of one of baseball's greatest players, Honus Wagner. Pay attention class, hear me now, once and for all. I'm not gonna repeat this later. It's HA-nus Wagner. Honus freaking Wagner! Rhymes with On-us, not Own-us...

The Athletics will trade for a first baseman…

The Seattle Mariners will play in the post season. Alex Rodriguez will not…

AL West: Mariners, A's, Angels, Rangers....

Leo Mazzone will stop rocking when it finally occurs to him that he's turned John Smoltz into Bret Saberhagen. Either that, or someone will smack him…

Compared to John Rocker, Gary Sheffield will look just a tad like Mother Teresa, and Atlanta will cruise to the division. The Braves will miss Brian Jordan anyway…

Free of Ted Turner and anything resembling the Tomahawk Chop, Jane Fonda will get to see a playoff game in person again this year, in Los Angeles…

Mo Vaughn will be traded to Boston...

When Vaughn visits the DL for the third time, Mike Piazza will make an appearance at first base…

Bobby Valentine will do everything in his power to distinguish himself from Joe Torre, and will succeed…

National League East: Braves, Marlins, Expos, Mets, Phillies...

Houston will bounce back again, and win the Wild Card. Jeff Bagwell and Craig Biggio will improve in the post season, combining to hit almost .200. The Astros will benefit, and win a game...

Not a peep from Bud Selig about a "wonderful renaissance" in baseball…

The St. Louis Cardinals will focus on team, and be better for it…

Rick Ankiel will be demoted, disabled, traded or released...

Pete Rose will be in our face during Hall of Fame weekend...

Barry Larkin will miss 50 games, easy...

The Seattle Mariners will play in the post season. Ken Griffey, Jr. will not...

NL Central: Cards, Astros (Wild Card), Cubs, Pirates, Reds, Brewers....

Rockies' GM Dan O'Dowd will drop out of the Executive of the Year discussion even earlier this year, when it's discovered that none of hisso called "revamping" can ever make a difference in Colorado. Mike Hampton will continue to regret going to Coors, and bust up some toilets, but be thankful his kids are in those great Denver schools…

Fox sells the Dodgers…

Klesko to first, Nevin to third, Burroughs to the PCL...

A prominent power-hitting infielder will be disabled after a freak accident involving water, or perhaps dirt, and either a two or four-wheeled recreational type vehicle…

Did I mention that the Seattle Mariners will play in the post season? Randy Johnson will not...

NL West: Dodgers, Diamondbacks, Padres, Giants, Rockies....