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The Best Damn Show Without a Comma Period

It's not that "The Best Damn Sports Show Period" is the worst damn sports show period. Not at all. It's just that the damn show is on so damn much on so many damn channels, it's just so damn impossible to miss the damn thing.

Let's see, flipping channels, there's Fox Sports, sure, makes sense. Moving on, Fox 2, OK maybe, but Fox 7, Fox 8, FX and several hundred of the affiliates, 24 HRS? Where's Jennifer Lopez when you need her? Enough! The damn show is on more than Cheers. It's on all the freaking time.

The sum of its parts are fine, actually. No problems. If you can get past the length and frequency, it's a damn entertaining little damn show, kinda damn.

Chris Rose is fine. Basic host, wears the right clothes for the demographic.

John Salley is a fun guy, telegenic, an example for Rick Fox. Good teeth.

Tom Arnold is good too, an actual talent. Fits the show perfectly. He's spent a decade getting out from under Roseanne, no pun intended, and has managed to do just that. He has a career now and she doesn't, which works for most people.

John Kruk is a wannabe Bob Uecker. Class clown. Passed-ball school. "Remember me? I'm the guy who struck out against Randy Johnson in the All-Star Game and almost fainted." It's a shame, because he was a great player, and it's been done. Since Uecker sucked as a player, his act made complete sense when he created it. Still does. Kruk's needs tweaking.

Who's that old wide receiver that keeps showing up? Preston Pearson, Lance Rentzel? Pat Studstill maybe.

Lisa G we've covered before. Someone should cover her more. Let's leave it there.

An Internet search turns up nary a good review of the damn show. Salon.com's Carina Chocano, forgetting to remove the show's comma, talks about "bimbonics," a "conflation of superheroes," and a "quorum of stars," which is good for her because she gets to use "conflation" and "quorum" in the same sentence.

I disagree completely. Conflations and quorums only count in horseshoes. It's a damn fine show, once a damn week, for a damn hour. A damn plan....

Howard Cole

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