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Off Base
The Jury Has Spoken

February 8, 2006

Yeah, the jury has spoken, all right. But what do they know? All they did was listen to evidence. What kind of way is that to render a verdict?! The idea of such a thing!! Bounders!!!

Look, it was a difficult case, and the City of Anaheim’s lawyers did a yeoman’s job with what they had. Weak contract happens. Arte Moreno gets to yell “scoreboard.” Bully for him. He’s still an L.A. wannabee with a cheesy mustache.

Let’s hope both parties have learned their lesson. And that is, quite simply, be careful with those prepositions.

If you’re gonna use phrases like “include the name Anaheim therein,” you better be prepared to accept the consequences. Like, you couldn’t see “the Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim” coming a mile away. Shame on you, Anaheim. Brandish a preposition, get shot in the foot.

So what’s next for all concerned? Well, I, for my own selfish reasons, would like the city to appeal. Because “Anaheim is appealing” is an awesome line.

“Anaheim is appealing.” Priceless. For everything else, like our fashion savvy "No Angels" t-shirts, there’s MasterCard…

Ah Wilderness! Rumor has it that in tribute to the great Curt Gowdy, ABC is bringing back "The American Sportsman," starring Dick Cheney...

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Auction for ALS Los Angeles: Sports sculptor, jeweler Malcolm DeMille and BaseballSavvy.com are proud to sponsor the eBay auction of Mr. DeMille’s beautiful Arnold Palmer sculptural trophy, “The Mentor.”

50% of the sale price goes to the local chapter of the ALS Association, which promotes awareness, support and research in the fight against Lou Gehrig’s disease.

DeMille also designed the Nissan Los Angeles Open championship trophy, which will be on display this week at Riviera. You know, the one with the palm trees. Usually goes to Mike Weir. And the sweet hood ornament silver piece, taken home by Tiger Woods at the Buick Invitational last week. That’s Malcolm’s too. Here's the link to the auction.

Golf Prediction: Mike Weir will win his third Nissan in four years…

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Keeping up with the Joneses? You betcha. It doesn’t look good for Wayne Gretsky, but let’s not try the case in the media, now.

But even without the familiar finger pointed ramrod straight at the camera, Janet Jones might have come up with a better statement than this: “At no time did I ever place a wager on my husband’s behalf. Period.” After all, it wasn't that long ago that old pal Rafael Palmeiro said, “I have never used steroids. Period.” And look what happened to him. The lesson here is elementary. Never end a sentence with a “period.”

Dodgers Season Ticket Share: Yep, you too can be a part of BaseballSavvy.com. And what a privilege, huh? We’re divvying up our nice Loge season package into quarter shares, which if you do the math, is 20 games. Grab half the season, which I’m pretty sure is 40 games, and get a guaranteed option to buy a World Series game at face price. Info

Statue for Sandy: The Koufax in bronze campaign continues, so please scroll back to the upper right panel of this page and vote yes on 32…

Talkback: Comments are encouraged. The more incoherent the better. When in Rome, you know…

Remember, glove conquers all….



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